Summer is creeping up on us here in Townsville like a sandstorm in the Ghobi desert. Winter is long gone and I sigh as I look at my longsleeve shirts in my closet, though I can’t complain about wearing shorts and t-shirts all year long. That’s what some people refer to as paradise. But because we live in a fallen world, paradise is always marred by a few things.

I call those things spiders and bats.

I am not afraid of bats. I actually think they are pretty cute. But if a cute baby has the most ear-peircing scream, it’s not so cute anymore.

We have a huge mango tree in our backyard and the bats love mangos. I mean LOVE them. They also love to fight and scream over the biggest mango, which always ends badly for someone. Amidst their screaming, one of them loses the mango from their precious claws and it drops like an a-bomb on our tin shed. Thankfully, this all happens between 8 and 11 pm, when of course no one is trying to sleep.

Not only are they clumsy, but messy and ironically acurate. On our street there are at least 25 parked cars along the curb. Ours must look the most appealing because in the mornings, it is streaked with bat poo. After a few days, there are different shades of droppings due to the freshness of the drop. It drives Nick crazy.

But we can live with that.

What’s worse is the spiders. This time of year the Huntsmen, as they are so affectionately named, are out on the prowl for bugs. Since they don’t spin a web, they don’t stay in one place. And because they travel, they are equipped to move at incredible speeds.

On Sunday night, I was preparing the house for Nick’s birthday. He was in our bedroom since I didn’t want him to see what I was doing. As I was blowing up a balloon, I saw movement out of the corner of my eye.

Oh Lord, please not now…

I pinched the balloon and craned my neck to see the door frame where I saw a speck of unnatural brown against the white paint.

There was the biggest huntsman spider I had ever seen. With legs and all, it was easily as big as my hand. I panicked (which for me means holding perfectly still and calling Nick’s name). Nick came bursting out of the door holding his hands over his eyes so as not to see my preparations.

“What, what??” He stumbled over to me, half blind from no contacts and the hands over his eyes.

“Spider, there…I can’t. It’s huge.” I pointed to the door. His eyes went wide. Oh, did I not mention that Nick hates spiders as well?

“Ok, well, grab me a shoe or something.” He stood like an officer in a stand off, bracing himself for any movement from the spider. I went to our wardrobe and grabbed a flip flip. Now, in hindsight, I think; a flip flop? A girl with 5 pairs of heels and the deadliest weapon I can find was a flip flop?

Nick took the sandal and before swatting, took a closer look.

“Whoa, that thing is huge…”

I stood in our doorway, helpless and shaking. Nick prepared his attacked, hit and just caught one of its’ legs before it scurried into the spare bedroom.

“Dang!”

My fear turned to anxiety as I realized we were not finding that spider tonight. We decided the best we could do was shut the door, stuff a towel under the frame and pray that it would die of boredom or starvation. Taking extra precaution, we shoved a towel (ok,2) under our own door and tucked ourselves into bed. The door remains shut 3 days later. Who knows how long they live.

Anyways, it is now summer and I realize that there will be more encounters with these pests and there is little I can do to believe that they will all just “go away.” I have decided the best I can do is move out of my paralysis and yell at the creatures - maybe they’ll listen.

It’s the most wonderful time of the year!!!

Tags: bats, fear, spiders

This entry was posted on Tuesday, September 30th, 2008 at 9:44 am and is filed under Entry. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.